Our first guest blogger is our guy Zee, who runs the @notmydadbod account and podcast, and provides content to help YOU achieve the only goal that matters: "Don't be a manatee!"
Not My Dad's Time Management
So, Ian and Steve asked me if I wanted to write up a blog for their site - knowing I am a sucker for writing and talking Dad stuff.“Full freedom!” they said, so how could I resist?Then I had to decide on what to write about – I mean there are a couple of things going on right now that could be worth adding my two cents, it has not exactly been a slow news year. Instead of going with The ‘Rona, the circus the is American politics or all the incredible stories of racial injustice, I went with something I am a bit more versed in – my kids. After all, this is a website/blog/podcast about being a Dad, how could I lose?
For those that don’t know me, I am a father of three, a medical professional and creator of the wildly successful podcast and social media juggernaut that is Not My Dad Bod (Full Freedom means I can embellish at my leisure). I am 46 years old and have three incredibly aggravating, I mean, incredible children: Jaxon, Emma, and Joey. I used to do the typical nursing schedule – three 12 hours shifts, every other weekend and holidays. About four years ago I switched to a five-day-a-week, Mon-Fri schedule as part of a job change that forced me to change basically everything in my life, from parenting to how I train, ate and even slept. There are pro’s and con’s to my (not-so-new) schedule that have made a dramatic difference in how I Dad. First and foremost, I am home every night and on the weekends, which was an awesome change but also a double-edged sword in that I think it made me more complacent in getting things done around the house or how I spent my time with my kids and wife.
Growing up, my dad worked for the phone company and had the typical 9-5 job, much like I do now. I remember him coming home, us eating dinner and then he would just chill in his chair until it was time to go to bed. Now, this is not an indictment of my father, by any means, he worked his ass off and made sure we were not hurting. I was also the last of six kids, so I had plenty of support and stimulation on a daily basis. As I climb the ladder and move up in my roles the perks increase for sure: higher salary, more autonomy and schedule flexibility. But, there is also the reality that I will be working at home and need to make phone call or jump on an email well after I have left the office. So, I wrestle with this at times. I want to make more money and provide a better future for my kids, but I also want to be there for everything and do not want to be too distracted by my job that I miss those moments that fly by. Also, I want my kids to see this, to understand how important they are to me and how much I want to be in their lives.
Every time I think I am doing well, I stop and ask myself, “is there something else I can do?’ Social media is a bitch because if you believe everything you see, everybody is the most dedicated father who spends all their free time with their kids, and does the coolest shit. Reality is a different animal and that’s what Dads need to understand. Do your best, love your kids, and make the time quality whether it’s playing Minecraft, shooting baskets or building a fully-functional rocket ship with real fricking lasers. And for goodness’ sake, have fun and don’t take life too seriously. I need to remind myself of this on the daily.
Learn from your kids on how spontaneous life can be. I am sure I am not telling many of you reading (are you still reading?) some sage advice you did not know, but sometimes it is good to hear it and know you are not the only one out there who thinks that way. Keep grinding, keep loving your family and taking care of yourselves so you are there for all of them for the long haul. And, most importantly, Don’t Be A Manatee!
Anthony Zalewski is an amazing Dad and multiple-time contributor to our podcast. Check out his podcast, you'll find tons of great content to help you Dad... whether it be fitness goals, time management, or you just need to listen to a couple Dads talk about life.